President Donald Trump appeared this morning on the WH lawn on what was billed as a "Celebration of Independence Day." A stunned WH Press Corp gasped in astonishment as the 45th president of the United States skipped to the podium dressed as Little Orphan Annie and started to sing, accompanied by a small ensemble, "Sometimes I feel like a motherless child!" It was a sight the likes of which had never been seen before in the history of the country!
Evidently, Trump had just signed a directive in the Oval Office dictating that all immigrant children separated from their parents at the US border would be tattooed with a "happy faced" imogee and an ID number. Several of the WH staff were dresses as characters from the musical Annie and followed Trump with a rendition of: "Tomorrow...tomorrow." The Associated Press is reporting that although the staff and members of the Fox News team were laughing and slapping each other on the back, other journalists sat in stunned silence and some appeared to be brushing back tears. Sean Hannity of Fox News called out in a loud voice..."ARF! ARF! said Sandy!" Many saw the president flash him a seductive wink as Senate majority leader Mitch McConnell shouted from the GOP delegation: "We say...YES...to the dress!
In related news, as cable networks exploded today with tapes of Trump's performance, a WH source has informed this reporter that Vice-President Mike Pence had been scheduled to appear as Daddy Warbucks in the performance however, his wife demanded he cancel due to the fact that Trump, dressed as Annie, would be wearing a short skirt!