Written by Dr. Billingsgate

Thursday, 26 April 2018

image for Trump Runner Dodges New ACME Golden Pee Pee Anvil
The Trump Runner

BILLINGSGATE POST: The only thing missing from this Norman Rockwell picture is his signature. The tranquil Sonoran Desert setting, where hundreds of episodes memorializing the epic battles between the Trump Runner and his sinister foil, none other than Wile E Mueller, was as busy as ever. Noteworthy, but not quite eligible for full disclosure, was the hissing of scorpions as they searched down and destroyed the frisky homopterans that hid in the shade behind the stately "Hands up, don't shoot" Saguaro cacti.

Basically, what we have here is a dichotomy; the eternal battle between good and evil versus the cataclysmic effect of the modernization of dangerous weapons. The original version of the infamous ACME Anvil featured a gravity controlled, standard anvil weighing approximately 80 pounds; somewhat bulky, but nevertheless, an efficient weapon easily dropped from rock outcroppings on unsuspecting Trump Runners who scurried among the cacti.

Then, despite Geneva Convention rules that apply only in times of armed conflict and seek to protect the victimization of Trump Runners, the Russians developed the RAT F**K (S-44) ACME Gravity Powered Anvil. As quickly as it was put into his arsenal, Wile E Mueller (a conflicted Russian running dog) attempted to bring down the elusive Trump Runner with this Russian made weaponry. But just as before, the anvil missed its intended target and whacked Wile E instead. Sadly, for Liberals who were waiting to read of the Trump Runners demise, all they heard was the recording of the "MEEP MEEP" that shattered the tranquility of the Sonora Desert.

Desperate for a more effective weapon, Wile E Mueller pressed the Russians for a more sinister weapon. VIOLA: The invent and subsequent evolution by Wile E Mueller of the tactical ACME Golden Pee-Pee Anvil, which now became part of the plan to destabilize and end the reign of the Trump Runner.

The Trump Runner reflects to Fox And Friends Steve Doocey:

"ACME ANVILS, son. Nothing else in the world smells like that. I loved the smell of ACME ANVILS in the morning until they started to smell like pee-pee."

MEEP MEEP!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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