Trump Tweets: Stormy Has Ramshackle Ovaries And Clapboard Breasts

Funny story written by Dr. Billingsgate

Tuesday, 13 March 2018


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BILLINGSGATE POST: Not wishing to add any additional ammunition to Stormy Daniel's claim that she had sex with The Donald at the Celebrity Golf Tournament at Lake Tahoe in 2006, Trump dismissed her by tweeting:

"As much as I admire her for her work in the porn industry, she has been over the hill for some time. In my humble opinion, she suffers from ramshackle ovaries and clapboard breasts."

It has been reported that Stormy's attorney, Stanley Fleesum of the highly respected Los Angeles law firm of Fleesum, Fuckum and Billum, offered to pay back the $130,000 his client accepted as payment to keep her highly painted lips shut regarding the alleged affair.

All is not lost with Daniels. While avoiding direct public remarks about the alleged affair, she is capitalizing on all the publicity with a "Make America Horny Again" tour of strip clubs from coast to coast. However, it has been reported that some of her rival strippers in these clubs agree with Trump's tweet that Stormy is over the hill and has ramshackle ovaries and clapboard breasts. Besides that, "she can't dance, and she snitches our tips before we can grab them."

Despite the acrimony coming from all sides, Stormy is looking forward to her CBS "Sixty Minutes" interview with Anderson Cooper this coming Sunday. It is hinted, that to verify her meeting with Trump, she will talk about the interesting conversation she had with the albino raccoon that is perched on Trump's head.

Cooper, who approaches all interviews with lesser beings with pursed-lip disdain, might actually fall in love with this notorious porn star if she attempts conversion therapy on him. Be sure to tune in.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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