President Bone Spurs to Save Children from Active Shooters

Funny story written by Mike Peril

Monday, 26 February 2018

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Washington, D.C. - In the aftermath of yet another mass shooting, President Donald Trump, nicknamed President Bone Spurs (B.S. for short), has pledged that if he is near a school with an active shooter, he will personally walk in to save the students.

As a result of the pledge, the president asked his security team to cancel all future bookings at or within 250 feet of a school, including book readings and graduations.

The pledge comes after President B.S. sought to arm twenty percent of all teachers, and to change the name of "active shooter" to "bad hombre" in all drills so as to not further alarm the children.

Meanwhile, the NRA, 5 million strong--with a personal ear to the president--continues to control the debate against the 320 million other Americans who believe in more gun restrictions.

"I really care about our children," tweeted the President. "But the second amendment is more important."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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