Ljubljana, Slovenia - The government of Slovenia, through its Ministry of Justice, together with the Slovenian Financial Administration, has issued a formal demand on Melanija Knavs, now known Mrs. Melania Trump, to return to her home country.
The government asserts that due to noncompliance of U.S. immigration laws, Mrs. Trump never properly left the country when she arrived in the United States in 1995 and is actually still a citizen of Sovenia. The government thus asserts that Mrs. Trump owes the government 15 years of back taxes, which, in light of her marriage to Donald J. Trump, is equal to hundreds of millions of Euros.
When Mrs. Trump heard the news, she denied any wrongdoing. She reportedly pursed her lips without release for a full three minutes and held back tears.
To prove its Visa fraud case, the Slovenian government also demanded that Donald J. Trump meet with Slovenian officials to discuss his role with Mrs. Trump's illegal immigration status in the United States.
The government also requires Mr. Trump to arrive with the couples' joint tax returns since their marriage in 2005. Mr. Trump refuses to turn over his taxes to the Slovenian government as he is under U.S. audit.
"No different folks," he said in response, "I can't turn over my tax returns. But if my wife broke the law, our marriage is null and void, so I wouldn't owe the Slovenian government anything. Marla, if you're out there, hubby's home."
To help demonstrate Mrs. Trump's guilt, the Slovenian government asked Mrs. Trump to arrive with proof of her college degree and her initial handwritten drafts of her 2016 RNC convention spech, now known to be plagiarized. The government believes that both issues will prove Mrs. Trump's propensity to be untruthful.
Mrs. Trump's half brother from Slovenia, who Mrs. Trump never met, said in a statement, "Zdravo Melanija ljubim te" which loosely translated by the Slovenian government means, "Mel, you abandoned me, never met me, never reached out to me, I hate you, give me money, I think you are guilty."
At another rally, Mr. Trump stated, "When did Slovenia become a country anyway? Isn't it still Yugoslavia? Those cars were pretty good by the way."
After an uproar by the press in reaction to Mr. Trump's comments, the Trump campaign later tweeted, "Sarcasm folks, all Crooked Hillary's fault that Yugoslavia fell."