Rudolph Giuliani was invited to join the New York City Ballet Company. After watching and listening to Giuliani's latest pirouette and grand jete in a desperate attempt to explain and translate Donald Trump's current misspeak:
"Hillary wants to abolish - essentially abolish the Second Amendment. By the way, if she gets to pick, if she gets to pick her judges nothing you can do, folks. Although the Second Amendment people, maybe there is, I don't know," said Trump.
Thus, the NYCB invited Giuliani. They'll supply his tutu. Making a fouette, (to turn in the air and landing in the opposite direction) Mr. Giuliani suggested that what Trump really, really meant was never, never to assassinate Mrs. Clinton, oh no, but to gather as a revolutionary group and vote against her before she is elected.
Trump said, "…if she gets to pick her judges nothing you can do, folks."
Hillary cannot pick her judges before she is elected. So what did everyone's lying-ears, including the Secret Service, hear?
With nimble toes, Giuliani sidestepped that issue right across the stage like a nimble member in the corps de ballet of Swan Lake.
Trump had ambiguously added: "Although the Second Amendment people, maybe there is, I don't know,"
Giuliani was sweating buckets. Thank goodness he no longer subscribes to the comb-over.
"They spin out that what he meant by that was - that it was a joke, and that what he meant by it was they would kill her."
Giuliani sort of tripped himself up there. Not too good. After that trip-up, the NYCB might just rescind their invitation.
By Wednesday morning Giuliani had recovered. No longer sweating and wearing a fresh new shirt, he appeared on ABC's Good Morning America. Standing in second position, he gingerly stepped forward, toe pointed, with his latest nutcracker translation:
"We know Donald Trump is not particularly indirect," Giuliani offered. "If Donald Trump was going to say something like that, (kill her) he'd say something like that."
Really? That's an explanation or a translation?
Forget Giuliani's need to explain or translate, what Trump really needs is a ventriloquist.