BILLINGSGATE POST: You can't make this up. Or maybe you can. By now everyone knows that the FBI is investigating Hillary Clinton's use of a personal server to handle her email account while acting as Secretary of State. Although she has consistently denied receiving or sending any information with a classified designation attached, it has been revealed that some of the messages were so seriously classified that not even ACME Corp was cleared to read them.
Wile E Coyote, head of ACME Misinformation and Skulduggery Division, told reporters yesterday that Hillary Clinton should have an ACME anvil tied to her neck and be thrown into a well for her alleged violations of the Secrecy Act.
Although the FBI has been very circumspect as to whether or not they will ask the Justice Department to indict Clinton or any of her advisers who may have collaborated with her, one story that FAUX NEWS insists comes from a source deep within the highest echelon of FBI rumor mongers, provides an insight as to why the FBI is so pissed off with Hillary.
In a meeting that reportedly took place last week between Hillary Clinton and a team of agents, Hillary was asked which of her advisers was responsible for setting up her personal email account.
"HAW HAW!" she chortled as she bobbed her head like a woodpecker on steroids. "Let me spell it out for you guys so that there will be no misunderstanding: H.U.M.A W.E.I.N.E.R."
FBI Agent: "Hum...Is that spelled with one or two M's?"
NOTE: Huma Abedin is the spouse of Anthony Weiner, former New York Congressman and notorious pecker poster boy; aka Carlos Danger.