Jihadi Donald Unleashes His Wrath on Caitlyn Jenner

Funny story written by Lady Sybilla

Saturday, 2 January 2016

image for Jihadi Donald Unleashes His Wrath on Caitlyn Jenner
I'm not gay, I'm just homophobic

Facepalm! Headdesk! Jihadi Donald is quickly running out of targets for his smear campaign and he must think of something fast, otherwise his silent-no-more majority might fall asleep and sink back into silence.

Not to worry, though. His politically incorrect minions have plenty of marginalized minority groups to pick on, and today the roulette has fallen on the artist formerly known as Bruce Jenner.

That's right, LGBT community, get ready for the mudslinging battle because Jihadi Donald's got his sights set on transgender fashion icon Caitlyn Jenner, and he ain't about to apologize.

"Kanye West be damned! Here I come!" tweeted Jihadi Donald this morning after Hillary's trolls descended upon the comment section of the Washington Post article that broke the news about the viral Al Qaeda video.

What with all the backlash TheDonald seems to be facing after his nemesis Hillary Clinton went and got all chummy with the jihadists just to get them to produce a recruiting video featuring Sir Carnival Barker himself, he's got to conjure up another controversy out of his bag of tricks and quick.

And what better insult fest can he schlong at his foes than hitting two birds with one stone? (No pun intended).

After all, Hillary has already managed to summon up the angry spirit of a defunct jihadist to prophesy against him. And, as if this weren't enough, she's also succeeded at galvanizing women and slapping a penchant for sexism on his campaign.

So, to say that Jihadi Donald is grasping for straws is an understatement. It's no secret that he's running out of options, as one day in the land of the internetz is like a year in Donald Trump's time.

He must heed the call of the wild and taste the rainbow before the polls start falling. This means Jihadi Donald must take a shot at one that's bound to harness the sympathy of both genders at once.

And there's no more strategic way to accomplish this than to go after the former patriarch of the Kardashian klan, the distinguished Caitlyn Jenner.

"I ain't trippin'," quipped Caitlyn in a short vid she tweeted as she leisurely drank champaign and soaked in her bathtub. "My sistas in arms will put him in his place soon enough."

And don't even get me started on the 800 thousand plus hearts Kylie Jenner gets on each of her Instagram posts. That's surely fodder enough to start an epic war between Jihadi Donald and the Ku Klux Klan Empire. Ooops, I meant to say the Kardashian Empire, silly me.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more