Written by Moose

Friday, 13 March 2015

image for Chris Christie Foundation Recommends Closing the income gap for fat people

TRENTON, NJ - The spokesman for The Chris Christie Foundation, Betha Buhderbahl, announced that the foundation will take on a troubling, weighty issue when it comes to the income gap between healthy people and the obese.

Obese people make 72 cents for every dollar a healthy person makes, according to the most recent figures from the Bureau of Labour Statistics. The foundation recently completed a comprehensive study, comparing obese people's earning compared to healthy peoples' earnings in various categories:

25-34 lbs. overweight: 90 percent

35-44 lbs. overweight: 78 percent

45-54 lbs. overweight: 62 percent

55-64 lbs. overweight: 51 percent

65-74 lbs. overweight: 42 percent

75-84 lbs. overweight: 33 percent

85-94 lbs. overweight: 22 percent

95-200 lbs. overweight: 18 percent

Over 200 lbs. overweight: 177 percent*

*This group had increased earnings, compared to healthy people. Although the reason for the increase was inconclusive, many of these people appeared regularly in magazines, websites, Dr. Phil, Maury and The Jerry Springer show.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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