London - A newlywed from the sacred Merovingian line is being fast-tracked to replace Ass-ended Master Osama.
Known only by his Emir Will Panic anagram codename the up-and-coming one flopped badly in spearheading the UK World Cup 2018 bid.
A spokesperson for Qatar 2018 said today "WTF?"
Meanwhile MI6 cryptographers are studying the formation of a corn circle-like birthmark that's suddenly sprung on the Young Wannabe's shining pate.
Rumors suggest it gives the GPS co-ordinates for the location of a secret Al Qaeda nuclear bomb.
The White House? Buckingham Palace? Sellafield Power Station??
"Probably up his very own arse," a security source commented.
Ayman Al Zawahiri is a useless tosser.
