Freed from their sex therapy clinic near St Andrews, Scotland the bad boys, Terry, Cole, Wood and Owens are having a rare day out at the home of golf, St Andrews.
Things did not begin well as Tiger was banned from the posh locker room by the up their own bums course officials and was forced to change in the car. Officials also banished the four to the 5th tee to prevent any trouble. The fact that the woesome foursome paid £2500 each for a round of golf made no difference. Their caddies were also appointed "birdie watchers" in case our gallant four assholes should seek to stray. Even on medication, the nasty boys will power was stretched to the limit.
All was going well but Tiger was feeling sadly under par taking 7,8,6,7 on the back nine. As they teed off on the infamous 17th "Road Hole" several birdies were spotted on the liitle bridge, a feature of the hole. Tiger had to explain to his UK chums that "hole" was not a rude word and that they should all calm down.
Eagle eyed Terry spotted some more birdies, the only ones he had seen in two hours with a round of 118 so far. He prayed for a round with a birdie from a bunker. He was not feeling up to scratch and his past birdie chasing hung like an albatross round his neck. Crossing the little bridge the four dastardly dolts saw their worst nightmare approaching. WAG's, theirs in fact, rushing towards them waving their drivers furiously.
"A hole in one " screamed the love of Tiger's life (well 1 of the 25 it seems), "you cannot even drive out of the house without smashing up your damn vehicle".
"Shit", wept Cole, "they told me it was a man only, no girls allowed, course".
Mark Owens meanwhile deserted the circus as he had taken a shine to a local lass wearing her "Could it be magic if you back Take That, Robbie" teeshirt.