Buckingham Palace - in a shock announcement this morning, Queen Elizabeth II has announced she will no longer interfere with UK or global politics.
The Queen is renowned for sticking her beak into things that don't concern her, such as the economy, political corruption, EU membership and oil prices.
The Queen was recently blamed for the Sir Fred Goodwin piggy banker debacle, after it was uncovered that it was she that originally awarded him with a Knighthood. "Had she not made him a Sir," said a member of the Anti Banking & Knights Association, "He would never have got a £10million bonus, never had been awarded a multimillion pound pension, he probably wouldn't have even lost £1.6billion of the bank's money."
"The same rule applies for Elton John" said the member. "If he had not been anointed with a Knighthood he would never have released that hideous song last year which caused the collapse of the Bank of Scotland."
"I'm washing my hands of it all" The Queen said. "I'm just going to sit around in my throne in PJs all day from now on, I'm not lifting a finger! I'm tired of getting blamed for everything! And if I see even one person with a spray can lurking around my house LOOK OUT!"