'Racist Shock Jock' called me a 'Dirty Fu*king Foreign Cu*t'!

Funny story written by The Big C O Jones

Thursday, 13 November 2008

image for 'Racist Shock Jock' called me a 'Dirty Fu*king Foreign Cu*t'!
'That's Tiny!!!' : The size of UK's balls to challenge PC Bullsh*t

Radio Shock Jock Chris Moylze was today embroiled in a bitter race row that is sending shockwaves through the Big Bottom Broadcasting Company (BBBC) only days after one of his colleagues was sacked from her show in similar circumstances.

Iamafta Sumfreekash is pursuing a claim against Moylze on the grounds of racial and religious discrimination after what Sumfreekash insists was a torrent of abuse directed towards him during a live broadcast by Moylze.

'Moylze called me a 'Dirty Fu*king foreign rag head cu*t who is a terrorist and kills people for fun' said Freekash.

'OK, he didn't actually use those words directly to me as he was broadcasting to the nation, and he was in fact saying nothing about religion but was talking about popular seaside resorts in the North of England and mentioned Blackpool, however he said the word 'Black' in Blackpool to suggest that I was a dirty fu*king foreign rag head cu*t who is a terrorist and kills people for fun so he might as well of said that to my face and I demand a lot of compensation'.

The BBBC has suspended Moylze and made an interim cheque made payable to Sumfreekash for £2m and has issued a directive that to make it more representative, the BBBC is to ensure its staff base is made up of 95% BME groups within 3 days to increase to 100% by the end of next week. Moylze is expected to be tried without jury and sent to the BBBC gallows where he will hang by his neck until dead without any further investigation into the incident.

When asked about the interim payment, Sumfreekash said 'It's Great! I love the UK exactly because of this kind of justice - and i'm not even black so it's a double victory of sorts. I never actually heard the broadcast myself as I was out of the country at the time it was aired; I overheard someone talking about it at a bus stop three weeks later and I was enraged! This and the election of Borat Obama has given me the confidence not to be kept down anymore, and I have approached a solicitor about suing the Hollywood producers of the latest Batman film as the title of it is the 'Dark Knight' and I think they are being a bit racialist'.

This incident occurs after the recent 'race and religion discrimination' cases whereby a 53 year old Jewish-Muslim Yafta Beejokin successfully sued his employers 'We Only Make Pork Pies & Pork Sausages Ltd' for £15m after a tribunal of weak willed fools upheld the claim that the job he applied for and had been doing for 20 years as 'Chief Product Packer' all of a sudden discriminated against him, and that of Police Asst. Commissionaire Tupac Guffur as he only managed to achieve the 3rd highest police rank there is in the UK even though he had years of service left and could have achieved higher rank based on merit.

On reading this report in the press, it is expected that the majority of people in the UK will give a stifled exasperated laugh to themselves whilst shaking their heads in disbelief muttering the words 'Un-Fu*king Believable' before hiding away behind their newspapers as they continue to be afraid to challenge all of the PC Bullsh*t that allows this sort of thing to happen for the fear they will be demonised, sued and/or imprisoned.

On a lighter note, a kitten was rescued from a tree somewhere recently.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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