Written by Monkey Woods

Saturday, 3 May 2008

image for Boris Johnson In 'Prime Minister Mix-up'
Boris Johnson today

Boris Johnson was last night declared the winner of the London Mayoral Election after a landslide victory over his main rival Ken Livingstone, but even as the results emerged, confusion reigned in the Johnson camp.

Boris, the Conservative candidate, inflicted a runaway defeat on Mr Livingstone, but later confessed to his aides that he now thought he was the Prime Minister. This caused consternation amongst his most loyal followers, some of whom said he was " a nutcase".

It was left to Tory leader David Cameron to point out that he, not Mr Johnson, would take control of the country should voters have 'a rush of blood to their heads' when the next General Election was called.

Mr Livingstone paid respect to the new Mayor by saying that he deserved the chance to show what he could do for Londoners, and thought that the blond mop-haired ex-journalist would represent London well when the 2012 Olympic torch was handed to him by the Chinese. Said Livingstone:

"Boris isn't the clumsy oaf he portrays on Have I Got News For You. Oh, no, I should say not. In reality, he's far worse!"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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