When out for their weekly shop Gary and Lorraine Johnson were surprised to see Christmas Cards in the window of Diane Goggins Village shop.
'I went in for a copy of the Daily Mail, Milk and Bread' said Gary 'and to my great surprise Diane Goggins already has Christmas Cards in the window'.
'I have to keep up with the retail calendar said Miss Goggins, a buxom 33-year-old, and nothing like the similarly named character in Postman Pat.
'That always gets on my nerves' she said 'I mean we do have a postman called Pat, who has a Black and White cat, but that is purely coincidental.'
'Yes' said Lorraine 'Gary was telling me how surprised he was and said that Diane had sold out, but when I reminded Gary that it is October, and Diane also had a lot more Pumpkins in the shop, as well as a lot of Witches hat he saw my point'.
'Halloween?' asked Diane 'No, I always have witches stuff in, and a lot of Pumpkins. I am the village witch as well, but don't tell anyone that'.