In these politically correct, LGBTQ-loaded, pan-hormonal, wokeness-gorged, give-a-dog-a-bone days of balanced diversity, companies in the UK have modified their set-up of management and Supervisory Boards to cater for such trends and crude paternalism.
The Guidance Committee at British Telecom is now made up of a white hairdresser, a black tanner, an Asian melon tree, three transgender mechatronic engineers, a two-faced builder from Rhyll and a hen.
"Diversity at its best," exclaimed Don Rotten, Chairman of BT. "After internal criticism we now also include one lady of staff at meetings, who is menstruating. We want no taboos, no more establishment decisions. This is 2021 and everything should be in there." Quite.
BT are pioneers in this environment and support from employees is massive. "Yeah," agreed electrical apprentice, Fred Hill, "I mean, I've been to Rhyll once and I love skillet chicken pot pie, so yeah. I do feel represented. I just feel better if someone from Rhyll's in there. Know what I mean? Gotta go with the times. Democracy innit...We are the woke generation..." Quite.
Barclays Bank, too, has moved on. New regulations require that at least two members from the League of Queer Cashiers be on the Directors Board. In addition to members specified at BT, Barclays also include tall Indians and Irish Travelers on its committees. "Our CEO is a gypsy, and rightly so," stated a gateman...sorry, gateperson.