Sacked Corbyn complains about Jew process

Funny story written by Sir Geoffroy Cockface

Thursday, 29 October 2020

image for Sacked Corbyn complains about Jew process
Corbyn: "How Jew you Jew?"

Jeremy Corbyn was today kicked out of the Labour party for failing to get a grip on anti-Semitism among his supporters. A damning report by the Equality and Human Rights Commission gives details of how anti-Semitism was widespread in the party under Corbyn's leadership.

"It's not fair," said the gnome-like Corbyn. "I want a fair trial, and Jew process," he continued, seemingly unaware of his continuing racism.

During his time as Labour leader, there were many instances of Corbyn's alleged anti-Semitism, where he would regularly bring up seemingly random comments about Jewish people for no reason.

Rabbi Abraham Geoffstein said that once Corbyn visited him in his home, where he offered the politician a cup of tea, home-made especially by his brother who runs his own tea room. "Why does Hebrew?" asked Corbyn repeatedly, in a bizarre anti-Semitic rant that Geoffstein was unable to respond to.

"It's like he was attacking the very nature of Judaism," said Geoffstein.

In another incident, at a mixed faith reception in a mosque in Finsbury Park, London, Corbyn refused a cup of coffee claiming he had recently returned from the dentist. Instead, he asked, "Have you got any Jews?"

Imam Mohammed Al-Jef did not understand his question, and was shocked when Corbyn continued, "I'd like to drink some Jews."

Al-Jef says that he believes Corbyn was trying to appear anti-Semitic because he believed his views would make him more welcome in the mosque, but as the imam explained, "We welcome all faiths here. There is no room for racists like Jeremy Corbyn."

Corbyn continued his anti-Semitic tirades today when complaining about his sacking. "With all Jew respect, I think I have been sentenced without the facts being examined fully. The Labour party has played judge and Jewry."

Jeremy Corbyn is appealing against his suspension from the Labour party.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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