Man still holding grudge

Funny story written by Ben Macnair

Saturday, 24 October 2020

image for Man still holding grudge
One road leads to happiness, one to a shallow and sour future.

Although it was thirty years ago, Raymond Ving still hasn't forgiven a barely-remembered acquaintance from school asking out a girl he liked.

'Lockdown has really given me a lot of time to think,' said Ray, 'and my life has been given meaning by my grudges, and my habit of neither forgetting nor forgiving. I mean, it is only the disappointment and spite that is keeping me going at the moment.'

Ray is currently married with three children, but seems to be unable to let go of his resentments. Ray's wife, Charlotte, said: 'Ray's spite and disappointment in his teenage years are all well and good, but he doesn't make myself or the kids feel special. The chap he holds a grudge against is currently in an American prison, and the girl is someone no-one remembers particularly fondly.'

Come on Ray, get with the programme, you miserable little git.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more