Child Fell Over In Playground

Written by Monkey Woods

Saturday, 8 June 2019

image for Child Fell Over In Playground
Be careful! You'll poke your eye out!

The hot, balmy weather at the weekend was enough to get most people out of the house and on the move, but one family who took their kids to a playground almost had cause to regret it, when their youngest son fell over, causing an injury to his leg.

John and Alison Cottonwool, of Roundhay in Leeds, took their eight children - Millie, Mollie, Mandy, Mark, Martin, Michael, Melanie, and Rufus - to the Mollycoddle Adventure Playground on Sunday afternoon, and looked on, happily, as their offspring ran around as if they were possessed by demons.

Disaster struck, however, when Rufus, 3, stumbled as he finished playing on the small children's swings, fell on his knee, and broke the skin in several infinitesimally small places. The tiniest hint of what was later found to be blood could be seen. The child bawled.

Alison, comforting Rufus, said:

"He cockled over whilst walking away from the swings. I don't think he was looking what he was doing, and that, unfortunately, is how these things happen. We've warned him to try to be be more careful next time."

Her husband said:

"These places are often minefields for very young children. Deathtraps. There's danger around every corner. The council are lucky we aren't suing them, although we're still weighing-up our options about that."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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