US President Donald Trump enjoyed a state banquet at Buckingham Palace tonight as the guest of HRH Queen Elizabeth, but rumour has it that the American was "a bit too much" for the Queen, and she had to adjourn to the lavatory on several occasions.
"Actually," confessed one of the Queen's ladies-in-waiting, "there was nothing wrong with her, but that man just makes her sick!"
Trump, never one to be careful about what he's saying or how he's saying it, asked the Queen questions about the War, Princess Diana, and James Hewitt, the father of Prince Harry.
The Queen was visibly bored. She yawned on several occasions, and called for some Schnapps.
Later, after Mr. Trump had finished his meal and left, the Queen sighed, and said:
"What an outrageous bore! I do hope I never have to meet that man again!"