Written by Bobby Dazzler

Thursday, 15 September 2016

image for National Treasures to be Housed in Museum

Britain's National Treasures, including the likes of Julie Walters and Dame Judi Dench, are to be rounded up and housed in a museum it was announced today.

The new Culture Secretary, Karen Bradley today unveiled her plans stating that it was vitally important we protect these treasures and keep them out of harm's way.

'We simply can't have Felicity Kendal, for example, walking the streets where she may get damaged. It is my job to look after our National Treasures and give the general public the opportunity to view them whenever they want.'

She went on to say that they will be on view alphabetically and that Sir David Attenborough will be the first treasure to be carefully lowered in next month.

Any National Treasure who refuses to go into the museum will be ordered to leave the country and live where they are not national and not a treasure.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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