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Man Had One Thought On His Mind: Baked Beans

Funny story: Man Had One Thought On His Mind: Baked Beans

A man who has spent much of the last ten years of his life away from his native England, had only one thought on his mind last night: Baked Beans! The man, Moys Kenwood, 55, left the UK in 2009, and, during his time spent abroad, first in Thailand...

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Wrapping Paper Is the Dark Lord's Gift to the Holiday Season, a Bowed and Ribboned Middle Finger to Humanity

Funny story: Wrapping Paper Is the Dark Lord's Gift to the Holiday Season, a Bowed and Ribboned Middle Finger to Humanity

You want presents? Ha-ha, first you must skillfully fold this multi-colored sheet of wrinkles into an immaculate presentation worthy of the gift it conceals. Good luck fucker! Gather round my legions of the damned and look on as this fool tries to cr...

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Study: Winners of Arguments Do Not Hate to Say 'I Told You So.'

Apparently, when people prove themselves correct over others, they often enjoy gloating for a moment, using sarcasm. According to new research, four out of five people who win an argument will use the addage, "I hate to say I told you so, but I told...

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Harry Potter and the Nipple Pumps - Culture Minister to consider Ban

Her Majesty's Principal Secretary of State for Culture, Media and Sport, Karen Bradley, has been asked by MPs to reconsider approval of the printing of J.K. Rowling's latest novel, 'Harry Potter and the Nipple Pumps'. "OK", explained the Culture S...

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National Treasures to be Housed in Museum

Funny story: National Treasures to be Housed in Museum

Britain's National Treasures, including the likes of Julie Walters and Dame Judi Dench, are to be rounded up and housed in a museum it was announced today. The new Culture Secretary, Karen Bradley today unveiled her plans stating that it was vita...

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This Country's Gone to the Dogs Innit?

Funny story: This Country's Gone to the Dogs Innit?

We have lost our bloody way as a nation we have. Our country has become infiltrated by joyless snobbish lefties, filthy immigrants, rampant homosexuals who are up for anything and miserable and fat feminists. What happened to the good old days innit? The good old days of Only Fools and Horses, Rolf Harris, Rod Stewart, The National Front, It It Ain't Half Hot Mum, New Faces, Jim'll Fix It, Dav...

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Black customer tips waitress

A Detroit-area waitress was pleasantly surprised Monday night when the black man she had served left her a tip. Emily Anderson of Roseville, MI has been a waitress at a local restaurant for 18 months, and, according to her, a black customer has n...

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Mark Twain Returns To Earth, Savages U.S.

Funny story: Mark Twain Returns To Earth, Savages U.S.

Mark Twain, who famously lampooned Christianity and the lifestyle in the U.S., human sexuality, and indeed all human beings, has returned to earth. He has been reincarnated in the form of a blogger and is published by both the print and electroni...

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Culture Vulture

Funny story: Culture Vulture

There was trouble at mill as the Culture Vulture, who nobody loves, Maria Miller, threw in the towel after ten rounds of her heavy weight bout with her supporters at the highly esteemed Mail and Telegraph. She suffered severe wounding to her pride...

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High School Student Reprimanded at Halloween Dance for Julianne Hough Costume

A local high school student received reprimand upon attending a school sponsored Halloween dance dressed as "Julianne Hough dressed as 'Crazy Eyes' from Orange Is the New Black ." "I don't understand it," stated Rachelle E. Inconchiss, "It's not a...

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Man Eating Pancakes At Waffle House Questions What Life Has Come To

BOREDVILLE, WI - "I was just trying to clear my head, so I went out for a drive and ended up at a WAFFLE HOUSE," states James Sadzack Sr., 52, of Boredville, WI. Sadzack had recently been interviewed by The Spoof satire writer, Tony Bagodonutz, re...

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Mans Recent Discovery of the Meaning of Acronym "YOLO" Forces Him to Take Another Look at His "FML" Stance

BOREDVILLE, WI - "I found out from my oldest kid that YOLO means you only live once," stated James Sadzack Sr, 52, of Boredville, WI. "I found out the meaning of FML about three or four years ago," Sadzack went on to say, "and that's the mantra I'...

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Solo Flash Mob Draws Little To No Attention

A 20 year old male peformed a series of dance moves in the electronics department of a local department store on Tuesday evening. "I don't understand it. I was busting moves left and right, all throughout the aisles. Nobody said anything. I w...

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Bartender Asserts Local Tequila Drinker is Dyslexic

"She kept messing up the order!" stated local bar keep Jim Bean, "she'd suck it, slam it, then lick it. Then she'd try again. Slam it, suck it, lick it. Never in the right order!" When asked about the debacle, the cute patron replied "Does it rea...

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Banksy unveils art installation made of his own shit

Funny story: Banksy unveils art installation made of his own shit

Controversial street artist Banksy has unveiled an 8ft wall painting of a masturbating baby made entirely of his own shit. The piece entitled "Waaaaa Waaaaa Wanky" which is the first of seven excrement-based pieces Banksy intends to produce; will...

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Unassuming Man Insults Iranian On Train

Funny story: Unassuming Man Insults Iranian On Train

An Iranian man visiting The Big Apple is set to sue the New York Subway system after claiming he was insulted by a multitude of passengers making his journey on the underground transit system "unbearable'. He is seeking $5,000,000 in damages. Ta...

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Coldplay Incite Mock Hatred

Funny story: Coldplay Incite Mock Hatred

As Coldplay performed at last nights Paralympic closing ceremony, opportunists seized on the fashionable trend of absolutely hating them, man. Fabricated musical snobbery was in full flow as pretend muso's bemoaned Coldplay's supposed lack of mus...

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John Terry To Be Appointed UK Goodwill Ambassador

Funny story: John Terry To Be Appointed UK Goodwill Ambassador

After recently being cleared of a trumped up aggravated racial abuse charge, John Terry, the former England football captain, has been nominated to take on the role of UK Goodwill Ambassador. Terry's nomination is believed to have cross party supp...

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