Ricky Hatton Cocaine Torment Serialisation To Be Handled By Max Clifford

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Monday, 13 September 2010


The funny story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for Ricky Hatton Cocaine Torment Serialisation To Be Handled By Max Clifford
Hatton coming back from the shops last week

Publicist Max Clifford has said that he, and he alone, will help former world boxing champion Ricky Hatton through his cocaine torment, after it was revealed the boxer was keen to sell his story to raise some badly-needed cash.

Hatton, 31, who has not fought since May 2009, has recently hinted he is ready to retire as a fighter. I thought he had.

Responding to a News of the World article, Max Clifford told BBC Radio 5 live that Hatton "feels he's let everybody that matters down badly" and that he is "distraught and devastated".

Clifford said Hatton had been urged by family and friends to go into rehab, but, like singer Amy Winehouse, had said:

"No, no, no!", adding, "I'm skint!"

"He does recognise that he's in a bad way mentally and been in a bad place for some considerable time, a year or so. That's Salford I'm on about!" added Clifford.

"He needs to face it full on, like he did against Pacquiao, and show the courage he always did whenever he climbed into the ring, even if he did end up getting battered!

"We all have to wait and watch and see what happens but what I'm hoping is that he tackles it with courage.

"I hope this will bring him to his senses and make him face up to a problem that has been concerning people for a while.

"Selling his story will help. The News of the World will probably do it. That's why they've made the revelations in the first place. That's what papers do: reveal someone famous is doing something 'very bad', then serialise the subsequent story. It's good business foer everyone concerned, including, and especially, me!"

A former two-weight world champion, Hatton can now be seen moping around the streets of his native Manchester like a bum.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more