Harry Redknapp In Line For England Manager's Job?

Funny story written by Geissler

Friday, 10 September 2010

image for Harry Redknapp In Line For England Manager's Job?
Redknapp's features have been distorted slightly to make his appearance less frightening

Tottenham Hotspur manager Harry Redknapp has this morning emerged as the man most likely to succeed England boss Fabio Capello when the Italian is finally ousted from his post, I can report.

Redknapp, formerly boss at Bournemouth, West Ham, Portsmouth and Southampton, told journalists the job would be 'hard to turn down", but there may be a problem: his puffed-up red face.

Capello has made it clear that he will quit after Euro 2012, and with the FA aiming to appoint his successor immediately to avoid any hitches in the World Cup campaign, Redknapp had high hopes of being the next international coach.

His face, however, is likely to be a major stumbling block. Looking like he has been through 15 rounds in the ring with Mike Tyson, Redknapp can regularly be seen sitting in the dugout huffing and puffing through crimson, bellowed cheeks, his eyes sinking ever deeper and deeper into them as he desperately sucks in more air. Many say he resembles a man who has just completed two marathons, so utterly exhausted does he look. White Hart Lane regulars have remarked how they have had to leave their young children at home, for fear of giving them nightmares after they have witnessed the horror of his bloated noggin.

Add to this, the fact that he shudders and shakes so nervously, that you think he might be on the verge of some nervous breakdown, or even heart attack, and the FA may think it would be better to appoint a manager who, at least, looks like he might make it until the end of the game.

Redknapp, himself, alluded to this when he said in an interview with the BBC today: "Honestly, it's not something I sit at home and ever think about. I really don't. 2012? I look at my life and I worry about next week, to be honest."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more