England Fans Demand Money Back After Germany World Cup Humiliation

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Monday, 28 June 2010

image for England Fans Demand Money Back After Germany World Cup Humiliation
Rooney today, running away from those who pay his salary

The England football team players packed their shirts, shorts and dirty underwear into their sporty-looking holdalls this morning after their World Cup exit at the hands of Germany, unaware that a new storm of protest was gathering.

The team, beaten 4-1 by the 'old enemy', have had a disastrous campaign, but have, at least, had the trememndous support of several thousand fans who have, in some cases, spent life savings following their heroes. Now though, some of those fans are demanding their money back from the FA and players.

One fan, Gerald Fortescue-Smythe, who left his £140,000-a-year job as marketing manager for the England football team, said:

"I'm disgusted. We were terrible. I spent my life savings coming here, and all we can do is scrape a win against Slovenia, two draws against the USA and Algeria, and beaten to a pulp by the Nazis! I want my money back!"

Another, Charles Dingbat, from Salford, told us:

"I've had to sign off the dole for a fortnight. What am I going to live off - fresh air? I demand me benefits back! And a Crisis Loan."

Albert Crockshite, 74, a Manchester United fan from London, was angry as he spluttered:

"All that money to see that shite! We pay these players wages, and traipse all over the place watching them. They should do the right thing, put their hands in their pockets and refund our cash!"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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