Rafa Benitez is being lined up as the shock choice to replace Sir Alex Ferguson as manager of Manchester United. When Ferguson eventually retires Old Trafford chiefs plan to appoint Benitez.
The announcement shocked many at first. Lifelong Manchester United fan S.K. Oob said "Bloody hell! How did this happen?"
Club officials were quick to answer Mr Oob's question. They pointed to the amazing similarities between the careers of the two managers. Spokesperson Terry Nutkins said "Before he came to Manchester United Sir Alex managed a team who wore all-red. Just like Rafa. Sir Alex managed a team who were kept in the shade by two more successful clubs. Just like Rafa. Sir Alex had won a couple of cups, but was never going to break their dominance. Just like Rafa. Sir Alex hardly speaks English. Just like Rafa."
With such similarities the appointment will surely make sense to all. Soon Rafa Benitez will enjoy the honour of managing Manchester United. Liverpool have announced that Sammy Lee is to be caretaker manager until someone slimmer can be found.