The world of cricket was rocked today by claims that Geoffrey Boycott was actually invented by the Belgians. Professor H. Owzat, of Cambridge University, has uncovered evidence that he believes proves Boycott's Belgian origins. It has always been believed that Boycott's dour batting style was a result of being a Yorkshireman. Now, however research shows that Boycott was so boring because he was invented in Belguim.
"If you look at video footage of Boycott batting you can clearly see just how boring he really was", said Professor Owzat, "he just prods on and on. Then we have his commentary. The monotonous drone, the harping on about the same point hour after hour. It's all so typically Belgian".
It is thought that this news will radically alter the history of the game. And someone might actually notice.