NEW YORK CITY - (Spoof News) - Sports Bet Gazette writer Zorro La Bamba has compiled a list of sports related tweets.
1. I already miss playing football so damn much, that I may return and play for free. -TOM BRADY
2. I am going to box Laila Ali in a nude boxing match in Las Vegas - RHONDA ROUSEY
3. Now that I have taken a course in English, my Venezuelan accent is just about 97% gone. -JOSE ALTUVE (Houston Astros)
4. Jerry Jones done went and did me wrong by releasing me just because he said my hair looked ugly as hell. -EZEKIEL ELLIOTT
5. I am not the least bit conceited, but I am the greatest athlete in the entire world. -EL GAZPACHO (Bullfighter)
6. People ask me why I seem to be getting better and better, well the answer is because of my hot, sexy girlfriend, Melania Trump -LEBRON JAMES
7. The secret to having winning racehorses is quite simple, I train them to run faster than all of the other horses in the race. -BOB BAFFERT
8.I always hear people say that soccer is not a real sport. Well it is. Now golf is not a real sport, it's just walking, and walking, and walking. -LIONEL MESSI
9. NASCAR has informed all of us drivers that they are considering making us pay for our own fuel - well fuck that shit. -KURT BUSCH
10. I promise that I will take my new team, the New York Jets to the Super Bowl. -AARON RODGERS
