The NFL Cheerleader Who Was Fired Simply Because Her Boyfriend Is A Central American Mafia Hitman Has Received a Severance Check For $3.5 Million

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Sunday, 21 August 2022

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Rizzmic says that her Mafioso hitman isn't one bit happy that his sexy "Rah-Rah" girl was fired.

WASHINGTON, D.C. - (Satire News) - One of the hottest cheerleaders to ever cheer for an NFL team is still very upset that the team owner terminated her, after he learned that she is the girlfriend of one of Guatemala's most notorious drug hitmen.

The cheerleader identified as Valerie Rizzmic, 26, who is from Shreveport, Louisiana, said that she had been told, just two months before, that she was one of the cheerleading squad's most beautiful, sexy, erotic, and sensuous 'rah rah' girls.

The story was first put out by reporter Hercules Confetti with The Turnstile Review, who has a brother who was a chief accountant for a mob crime family in Chicago.

Confetti noted that Miss Rizzmic was given a monetary payment of $3.5 million to simply leave without putting the story out to the news media.

Meanwhile, her boyfriend, who is being identified as "El Shooter," continues to work for Guatemala's notorious Tapachula Hombres Drug Cartel, which is based in Guatemala.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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