NEW YORK CITY – (Sports Satire) – A vast majority of America's football sportswriters have just named the Atlanta Falcon’s Mercedez-Benz Stadium’s playing field as the most horrible in all of the NFL.
Sportsapalooza reporter Pia Confetti, who has watched several games at MBS agreed wholeheartedly, saying that after two quarters one develops the most awful headache imaginable.
She noted that she actually saw several fans throw up because of the dizziness that was brought on by the field, which appears to be at least 7 or 8 different shades of green ranging from chartreuse, to lime, to Kelly, to moss, to spinach.
When Miss Confetti asked an official with the Atlanta Falcons, who in the world had designed the playing field color scheme, she was told that the individual is presently in the witness protection program.
SIDENOTE: Miss Confetti remarked that she spoke with one of the Falcons recievers, who asked her not to reveal his name, and he confided to her that he hates the playing field so much, he has requested to be traded.