EURO 2021 – (Sports Satire) – Reports are that the Coca-Cola Company is very upset with Juventus Football Club forward Cristiano dos Santos Aveiro Ronaldo, for taking two bottles of the soft drink and pouring them on a reporter with Russia’s national news agency The Kremlin Voice.
Ronaldo explained that he merely moved the bottles, because they were blocking his view of the wonderful sports reporters from 93 different countries.
The 36-year-old Portuguese super star was told by Euro 2021 executives that he needs to apologize to KV reporter Alexei Maxim Pushkingradski, Jr., 30, as well as to the director of Coca-Cola Advertising Placement Loretta Susie Branchbiffy, 43, who just got engaged on Tuesday.
The footy who wears uniform number 7, said that he will apologize when England’s Queen Elizabeth runs in Boston's 26-mile marathon.
Ronaldo added that he personally prefers to drink diet water and pointed out that his coach Massimiliano Allegri and teammate Wojciech Szczesny both drink Coca-Cola.
The world renowned football forward even pointed out that Woj sometimes drinks a six-pack of Coca-Cola with his dinner.
Meanwhile a Coca-Cola spokesperson stated that the soda giant has just cancelled the $43 million deal that they were going to pay Ronaldo to film a 60 second Coca-Cola commercial down in the South Pole.