EURO 2021 – (Sports Satire) – Reports are that the Coca-Cola Company is very upset with Juventus Football Club forward Cristiano dos Santos Aveiro Ronaldo, for taking two bottles of the soft drink and pouring them on a reporter with Russia’s national…
Philly (WN) — Over $1billion worth of illegal coke was seized during a bust at Packer Avenue Marine Terminal in South Philadelphia on Tuesday, the U.S. Attorney’s Office says. "We have to thank our informants, "Lisa Lisa" and the "Hernandez Circus Ch...
Michael Gove, one of eleven Conservative MPs vying for the job of party leader, has said that the fact that he "took cocaine on several occasions more than 20 years ago" should not affect his bid to become Britain's prime minister. Gove, ironicall...
Choke-a-Kola is whining that a 10-percent tariff on imported aluminum makes its product more expensive. As a result, the company claims, it has no alternative but to “pass on” the costs of the tariffs to consumers. To make up the difference, Choke-a...
OUT THERE -- Famed financier Warren Buffet says his secret source of energy is in his name: buffet. "Eat like it's your last meal," he advises six-year-old schoolchildren, "and you're at an all-you-can-eat buffet!" That's where the octogenarian-pl...
Atlanta, GA, USA - Despite a decades-long effort, the Coca-Cola company has not yet built the world a home or taught the world to sing in perfect harmony. The company's efforts began in 1971 with a television commercial featuring a multi-cultural gro...
Although there is no evidence in the forty-nine other states (or, as yet, even in Washington, D. C.) that drinking soft drinks could be hazardous to consumers' heath, California, The Land of Nuts and Fruits, will require Coca-Cola, Pepsi, and other s...
“I don’t care, do u?” Message on Melania Trump’s jacket, when visiting the border. O beautiful for spacious skies, For people who are white, For those who can speak English And sometimes get it right! America! America! God shed his grace on thee And crown thy Aryan brotherhood From sea to shining sea! O beautiful for xenophobes Whose stern impassioned hate Is clothed in hoods and c...
MANCHESTER, England - Aspartame Boy now has first hand evidence that you CAN lose weight on Diet Coke. He actually lost 20 stone after switching from Diet Pepsi to Diet Coke. "I don't know why, but I just started losing weight like crazy after I...
Animal Rights activists are up in arms after George the Chimp was found dead in his cell at the Center for Simian Studies and Anthropology in Coventry. Curious George was the first Chimp in captivity to figure out how to use basic kitchen implemen...
Rooters - In a surprising twist of events, related by a John, a stagehand at American Idol, a giant baby wearing nothing but a smile, fell onto the stage on top of Lady Gaga, knocking the fake mole off her face during rehearsals with Jamie who invol...
Following her recent admission of a late night movie party in Daniel Radcliffe's room on set of the new Harry Potter movie, and her love of Coke and M&M candies, both companies have sent Emma Watson a lifetime supply of the products. Though Ra...
In a startling revelation and nineteen years after the Clarence Thomas Supreme Court nomination hearings, Virginia Thomas has reportedly left a message for Anita Hill apologizing for her part in the controversy. One of the most shocking revelation...
We'd expect some kind of controversy from a Pepsi promotion because Pepsi is hip, it's now, it's happening, unlike Coca-Cola, it's backward-thinking rival. So when we heard that Coca-Cola had been caught posting porn messages on teens walls on Facebo...
INDIANAPOLIS, IN (Friggemall Wire Services) - Coca-Cola has announced plans to cap a ruptured line in an unprecedented attempt to stop the flow of soda that threatens a near northside restaurant. The Chuck E. Cheese was thrown into chaos last Frid...
Detroit, Michigan - Two men had an idea back in 1981 for bottling water. They shared it with a giant soda company who promptly stole it. Having sued and won over a billion dollars, due to the Phizz Cola Company not contesting it, the two are about...
After a lengthy report today by the World Health Association that claim that coke causes many major health issues, especially with younger people, the chairman of Cokeapep, the huge world wide drinks manufacturer rejected the report emphatically.
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