Richmond, VA. An SOS from Wood Blister in an exclusive to Spoof On Sports.
In response to efforts by liberal Northerners to remove Confederate statues, names of Confederates from military bases, and the banning of the song "Dixie" at athletic events, the "Sons of the Confederacy", meeting in this one-time capital of The Confederate States of America, have demanded that the New York America League baseball team drop its nickname, "Yankees".
"We find it offensive that, for decades, the predominant team in baseball has carried that demeaning name so closely associated with our opposition in the War Between the States. When that team takes a road trip into Dixie, it is a reminder of General Sherman's inhumane march through Georgia over a century-and-a-half ago. Those wealthy Northern owners of that team haven't had the decency to realize the hurt that returns each time a "Yankee" team enters the South. Can you imagine the Northern outrage if a Southern team carried the nickname of Stonewall or Confederates?
"If the name "Redskins" is demeaning, why isn't "Yankees?"
When asked about the complaint, the press agent for the New York team simply smiled and said: "Our teams usually mop up on those southern squads. Maybe we should change the name to Sherman's Marauders."