WASHINGTON, D.C. - Now that Daniel Snyder, owner of the soon-not-to-be Redskins, has finally gotten with the program to change the racist team name, lots of people are chiming in with ideas.
One long-time fan suggested the name the Washington Washed Ups, in honor of all of Washington’s elderly politicians, such as Mitch “The Turtle” McConnell, 78, Chuck “The Caveman” Grassley, 86, and Dianne “The Dinosaur” Feinstein, 86.
A member of the Red Lives Matter movement, said that she thinks the name Rednecks would go well with the bigoted fan base that wanted to keep the name Redskins.
Sports Balls Illustrated asked its readers to send in their suggestions. They say that if a fan gets his or her suggestion picked, then he or she will receive season tickets to all of the home games, a $300 gift certificate to Red Lobster, a year’s supply of Big Red Soda, and a slightly used AR-15 Semi-Automatic Rifle.
• Washington Red Dragons
• Washington Wart Hogs
• Washington Fighting Flamingos
• Washington Swamp Creatures
• Washington Red Racoons
• Washington Wild Walruses
• Washington Red Rockets
• Washington Wildebeests
• Washington Tarantulas
• Washington Barbarians
Sports Balls Illustrated stated that Daniel Snyder, his wife, Tanya, and Ivanka Trump will be determining the winning name.