Donald Trump Tells IOC That "Sumo Must Be Part Of Japan Olympics"

Written by Monkey Woods

Wednesday, 29 May 2019

image for Donald Trump Tells IOC That "Sumo Must Be Part Of Japan Olympics"
Dog turds are almost unknown on Japanese streets

Recuperating after a gruelling three-day jolly in Japan this morning, President Donald Trump wasted no time in going on the offensive once again, as he tweeted that:

"the IOC are nuts if they don't include Sumo in the Tokeyo Olimpycs 2020!! Nuts!!"

The International Oympics Committee last month decided that Sumo Wrestling would not be a part of the Japan 2020 Games.

Mr Trump attended a the Summer Grand Sumo Tournament during his state visit to Japan last week, and was mightily impressed with the wrestlers and their attire. He hinted that he would be having discussions with IOC officials about the inclusion of Sumo, especially as the event was in Japan, and particularly as he'd received a $10million bung to do so.

Trump was his eloquent self, as he wrote:

"There are a lot of people in Japan, and they all like to play Sumo. They might look a bit funny, but that's their affair. I'll pull a few strings. I'm owed a few favors. Japan Olimpycs and Sumo go together like shoes and dog turd."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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