California Doing A Slow Burn
At a meeting in Los Angeles, California this morning, the states Smokey The Bear Ads came under fire.
written by Bureau, 11 December 2008
The Kudzu Threat
Al Gore on global warming: Kudzu will overgrow entire United States southern cities overnight. It'll come into your window while you're asleep and its vines will choke you to death.
written by Bureau, 11 December 2008
Generically Engineered Crops Cleared
Genetically engineered vegetable crops are absolutely no threat at all to human beings says FDC Head, Cabbage Doe.
written by Bureau, 11 December 2008
Body Of Drunk Found Bred
Police in New York City say they found the body of an unknown drunk bred in an alley in Lower Manhattan, over the weekend.
written by Bureau, 11 December 2008
Plumber Knows His Shit
Joe the Plumber told a reporter yesterday that he'd thought hel'd dealt with shit before but nothing like the flying stuff on the campaign trails.
written by Bureau, 11 December 2008
Obama To Use "Hussein"
Barack Obama says he will use his full name, Barack Hussein Obama when being sworn in as president of the United States. Upon hearing this, Joe "The Knee-Breaker" Biden says he will use his also.
written by Bureau, 11 December 2008
Whatchadoodle My Replace Whatshisass
Illinois police have now arrested Tetaumatawhakatang Porangahau who would replace Rod Blagojevich position as Governor of Illinois after he resigns over fraud concerning Senate seat.
written by Bureau, 11 December 2008
Two #6's Same
In an unusual twist, #6 on the Blagojevich Sale of the Illinois Senate Seat List and #6 on the al-Qaeda most-wanted list is the same person.
written by Bureau, 11 December 2008
Congress After Car Czar
Congress wants to appoint a new Car Czar to oversee auto companies. Then they want to appoint a Supreme Car God Of All American Car Makers to oversee the Car Czar.
written by Bureau, 11 December 2008
Palin, Joe In Movie
Walt Disney Inc. has announced that they have signed Sarah Palin and Joe the Plumber to do a movie, scheduled to come out in Spring of 2009. It's title: "Dumb Amd Plumber"
written by Bureau, 11 December 2008
Illinois Gov: I Cut Out The Middle Man
Governor Rod Blagojevich says lawmakers are using double standards arresting him for selling Senate seat: I just cut to the chase. Everyone knows money wins presidency, etc. I cut out the middle man.
written by Bureau, 11 December 2008
Is The Name Blagojevich Yiddish For Arrogant or What?
Gov. Blagojevich says they will have to drag him out yelling, kicking, and screaming. Five state troopers grabbed the governor and dragged him out yelling, kicking, and screaming.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 11 December 2008
Thousands of Unemployed GOP'ers
The U.S. Labor Department reports the unemployment rate is the highest it's been in 26 years...and that doesn't yet include, George Bush, Dick Cheney, Condoleezza Rice, and 1,000 other GOP'ers.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 11 December 2008
One Espresso And Hold The ( _____ )
McDonald's billboard signs proclaim, 'Four bucks is dumb.' (a stab at Starbucks). A Starbucks spokesperson said, "But hey, at least you won't find any wayward sesame seeds in our espresso's.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 11 December 2008
Sarah Palin's 'Nuts" Remark
Sarah Palin was asked to comment on Gov. Blagojevich's situation. Palin winked and said, "Well, ya know one thing for sure...the guy certainly has more nuts than a tree full of squirrels."
written by Abel Rodriguez, 11 December 2008
Iranian Storm To Hit Israel
Barack Obama offers Israel a 'nuclear umbrella' if she is attacked by Iran. Israeli President Shimon Peres said, "And a few thousand 'nuclear raincoats' and 'nuclear galoshes' wouldn't hurt either."
written by Abel Rodriguez, 11 December 2008
Immigrant TV: On Tonight's show
Tonight, viewers will be treated to an episode of Middle-Eastenders at 7:30pm
written by IN SEINE, 11 December 2008
Blagojevich's Aspirations
A train seat in the Loop: $2.00
A Cubbie seat at Wrigley Field: $40.00
An alderman seat in the city of Chicago: $12, 500
A Senator seat from Illinois: Priceless!
written by PP Rega, 11 December 2008
Aspartame Discovered on Uranus
After a routine health checkup, Dr. Strangedeath, FDA, was told the shocking news by his protocologist.
written by Aspartame Boy, 11 December 2008
Gesundheit
President-elect Obama has chosen Steven Chu to be his energy secretary. Chu's wife, Ah Chu (gesundheit) was so elated that she could not stop sneezing.
written by Abel Rodriguez, 11 December 2008
