Written by matthatt

Tuesday, 7 September 2010


The story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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image for Facebook usage declines as London workers can't get to work
Thank god I'm at work at last. I can have a rest now.

Millions of commuters across the British capital struggled to get to work on Tuesday, as a 24-hour strike by workers on London's underground rail system crippled much of the internet.

Sales were down at online stores due to secretaries not being able to go online from their desk and purchase the latest slapper wear that they had seen on TV Monday evening.

Porn sites were left "virtually" unmolested by bankers and other men as they had all been left out in the cold by the "industrial action", which is in itself a bit of a misnomer as there isn't much industry or action in NOT going to work.

Social networking sites bore the brunt of the low internet usage due to the millions of stranded "workers" not being able to get to their offices to drink coffee, sit on their arses and chat to their mates on Facebook about how pissed they were over the weekend, while playing Farmville and Mafia Wars.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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