The Baghdad Bulletin,Iraq's only English language newspaper is running with a banner headline this morning that reads:
Porn Shops in Baghdad: "Mission
Accomplished"
"Finally," the article states, "American-style democracy comes to Iraq as porn shops and brothels open in Baghdad. While US troops stay mostly in the Green Zone, Iraq's by the thousands are pouring into the Red Zone, Baghdad's version of Amsterdam's Red Light districts. Neon signs light up the streets and read like internet porn sites. The lights blink off and on:
"Burka Babes"
"Sexy Sunni's"
"Kinky Kurds"
"Sultry Shiites"
"Seventy-Two Virgins Leaping"
" Pole Dancing Pashtuns From Pakistan"
"Poontang from the Punjab"
Iraq men are thronging to the new sex outlets and praising Americans for their contribution to this ancient culture. "This is shock and awe like we have never seen before," said one tribal elder. "I'm not going back to the tent tonight!"
In breaking news, thousands of Taliban are quietly moving to Baghdad, shaving their beards, changing to western attire, and joining internet dating sites. "Seventy-two virgins, my ass," said one Taliban leader."I'll take a bird in the hand any day!" He laughed, "or a bush for my bird! The war is over as far as I'm concerned. Where is the nearest Wal-Mart"?
"Mission Accomplished," states the Baghdad Bulletin.
