A top team of Professors and Grad Students worked to study the results if the long postulated and proverbial "shit hit the fan." In a double-blind study involving fans and feces from multiple sources and in different weather conditions, the results have been released.
Dr. Beckett Samuels, PhD, revealed that at a cost of 1.6 billion dollars and after three years of intense research, the team has reached some interesting conclusions.
The net result of the flying fecal matter intersecting with the rotating inclined plane is such that the impact causes feces to be broken into smaller pieces, which then travel in the direction of airflow and intercept any solid object in their flight path.
The team found this to be true in optimum and less than optimum weather conditions and with varying degrees or wetness or dryness in the fecal samples.
While fan motor strength did play a part in speed of impact and distance of possible impact, lesser powered motors still yeilded similar results.
"In other words, when the shit hits the fan, you get a shit shower," Dr. Samuels concluded.
Your tax dollars at work.
