GUATEMALA CITY – (Sports Satire) - A little over 80,000 fans attended the season’s opening day game between the Guatemala City Banananistas and the Zacapa Iguanas. Guatemala City manager Edelbertito Luna del Sol was very happy with his team, who p…
NEW YORK CITY – Major League Baseball Commissioner Robert “Bobby” Manfred is thrilled to report that baseball will soon be back at the dozens of MLB parks, stadiums, fields, and domes. Manfred told Hiawatha Pamplona with Sport’s Territory Magazine…
A football team has turned the tables on abusive fans, as they booed a section of their home support at the final whistle. Siddrington Town, who play in the 15673rd tier of English football, turned on their support at the end of a dismal 0-0 draw...
Actor Tom Banks, whose net worth is estimated at $350 million, give or take a million, played Santa Claus at an N-n-Out Boogers in Fontana, Californicate, treating his fans to a free lunch. “Order anything you want,” he told his devotees. “Money i...
Fan forums worldwide have gone into meltdown when it emerged that footage of a new, previously unheard of, Doctor Who monster, had been leaked online. Called the 'Wo-Men', they are in fact a race of Cybermen. Unlike their cold, logical, counterparts...
Men, women, and even children as young as five are having the suddenly popular Drakoplasty surgery. This reporter first heard of the procedure when a family member was lamenting her lack of $30,000 so she could have the surgery. Drake, the mult...
Prince fans saddened by the death of the artist purchased the first million of the new Prince postage stamps within four hours after they went on sale. Demand for the purple postage slowed down the official USPS website even hours after all available...
Bangor - The new Cherry Blossom Arena is hosting its first event this evening when the Indie rock band Buster Himen and the Penetrators blow into town for the first concert of their 69-show tour. The band was formed two years ago and is highly re...
Belfast, Scotland - The HBO series Game of Thrones is undisputedly a hit. Currently in its 4th season, the show draws almost 7 million viewers per episode. In contrast the audience for Season 1 was less than 3 million viewers per episode. The show ai...
Toronto, Ontario - The Stanley Cup is no more. The professional sports world's most iconic championship trophy has been recast into dozens of personal "Support Stanleys" - individual-sized cups designed to shield a player's privates from th...
BOSTON - The Boston Celtics were founded in 1946, and since then they have managed to win a total of 17 NBA Championships. Lately there has been a lot of talk from some of the loyal Celtics fans about changing the team name to a more modern soundi...
Justin Bieber was a happy lad after reading in an old magazine that there was a man in a circus act years ago who did trick farts! "I had never heard of him but this wasn't made up, it was true", he told a friend. Justin's friend is one of many...
A man suddenly jumped onto the podium during Super Bowl MVP Malcolm Smith's postgame news conference, grabbed the microphone and said the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks were "perpetrated by people with your own government." "I was totally surprised by...
TOPEKA, Kansas - The governor of Kansas acting on the demands of the citizens of the state has issued a Governor's Proclamation which will allow him to install gigantic fans on the Kansas-Colorado border. Governor Sam Brownback stated that he has...
Selena Gomez has announced that she is cancelling her tour overseas and will have tests ran to see what her problems are all about. "I simply do not feel like that tour and I wanted it very much", she told reporters. "I don't know what is wrong. I...
Of all people who have been a victim of the new 'Knock Out' craze, actor Taylor Lautner would be low on the list. Taylor was found by a New York City policeman just as he was waking back up. "He was groggy but then checked for his billfold, car...
NEW YORK CITY - The NBA after much consideration has decided that it will be prohibiting fans from hollering out the phrase "Deee-Fense!" whenever the opposing team gets the ball. An NBA spokesperson likened the yelling out of that phrase as kind...
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