South Florida couple buys hologram projector to keep up with Joneses

Funny story written by King David

Friday, 9 November 2007

image for South Florida couple buys hologram projector to keep up with Joneses
Hologram projectors may hold answers for American materialism sinking so many young couples in debt

A south Florida couple with working class roots said that they bought a hologram projector to keep up with their neighbors and give the appearance that they were actually doing better than they were.

Dan and Tammy Baker said they were tired of trying to compete with their neighbors, many of whom were aggressive working professionals with college degrees and decided to get the projector.

"If we had continued on the path that we were on," said Tammy Baker, "We would have been in the hole $100,000 very soon."

The projector that the Baker's bought was a Heliodisplay I03 model that displays floating, volumetric 3D images into mid-air like the one used in Star Wars to project the image of Obie Wan Kanobe. This model sells for about $18,000. But that kind of money is nothing compared to what it can do according to Dan.

The Heliodisplay I03 model has to capacity to project a $50,000 BMW into your driveway and a $3,000 HD Plasma screen TV set in your living room simultaneously. Larger models will even project a million dollar, 7,000 sq. ft. McMansion on a quarter-acre lot, hiding the projector, so that neighbors cannot see it.

Heliodisplay Io3's loaded with special software can even project trophy wives walking from the bedroom to their bath in sheer lingerie and then to the BMW in the drive to go to the shopping mall and back home again to pay the housekeeper and put another pair of shoes into the closet.

"$18,000 is nothing when you think of what it can do," says Dan Baker. "Now we are free to really enjoy ourselves and no longer have to worry what our neighbors are doing."

Environmentalists are even encouraged about the technology. People will no longer have to buy SUV's, Hummers and McMansions and we can all live in peace.

Airlines and stock traders also see the advantage in using the Heliodisplay I03's. But analysts say that the technology is nothing new to Wall Street, and, in fact, point to rumors that Alan Greenspan is really a hologram and has been for years.

No one was around for comment.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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