CHICAGO - (Satire News) - US health experts want to assure the monkey meat eating public that eating monkey steaks, monkey burgers, or even monkey pizza will not cause the eater to develop the dreaded Monkeypox.
Dr. Gordy Gorfellsteen, stated that his group, The Gorfellsteen Research Group, has conducted strict tests on Monkeyarians, those who eat monkey meat, and the study did not turn up even one monkey meat afficionado that contracted the Monkeypalooza virus, as it has been pegged by a fast food monkey food diner in Brooklyn.
The good doctor did want to make the eating public aware of the fact that they should exhibit caution when eating bananas whose seeds are fluorescent magenta in color and that smell like generic turpentine ■.
