BOWLING GREEN, Kentucky – (Satire News) – Mother Nature can at times be a very unruly woman, who can wreak havoc at the weirdest times and at the most unusual locations.
The US Weather Guild (USWG), reports that one of the most powerful hailstorms to ever hit North America, battered the town of Bowling Green, Kentucky, which is home to one of the largest bowling ball companies in the nation.
The Sheriff of Warren County (Bowling Green), Ralph T. Bickerberry, 42, said that the hail was the size of fucking bowling balls (no pun intended).
He noted that city dumpsters, which are made out of 100% iron, were dented as if they were made out of fucking Styrofoam.
Sheriff Bickerberry, who recently made national news when he apprehended six illegal aliens from Switzerland, said that one of the local McDonalds was totally leveled by the mother fucking hail. (Yes Sheriff Ralph does cuss like a sailor).
He added that luckily the grandmother of all hailstorms hit at 3:35 am, so there were no reports of any injuries; except for the local town whore, Charleen Cluxwater, 39, who was coming out of the Happy Beaver Motel at that hour.
SIDENOTE: Sheriff Bickerberry, who is a first cousin of Charleen’s, said that the injury to her muffin (pussy) is not serious and she should be back on the street within 14 hours.
