Autumn Equinox special: defunct UARS satellite 'may be stalking Climate Research scam professor' - report

Funny story written by queen mudder

Thursday, 22 September 2011

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Outside the notorious Climate Research Unit in Norwich today

East Anglia - Is there really a satellite homing device implanted into the academic behind the University of East Anglia's global warming scam?

NASA sources hinted today that the spent Upper Atmosphere Research Satellite's imminent crash landing may be on a karmic trajectory tracking the UEA Climate Research Unit's Professor Phil Jones.

Impact at the Norwich campus is estimated for 10.04BST, the exact moment of the Autumn Equinox, where fellow global warming scammers have apparently already gone into hiding.

Jones was at the core of a 2009 investigation about manipulated and fraudulent climate data described by some as a campaign of 'sexing up' statistics to fit an anti oil and gas industry agenda.

"Yeah, mostly sentimental hogwash about poor polar bears struggling for survival on their new-found Mediterranean ice floe homes," a NASA climate nonsense debunking expert commented on TV News this morning.

The US space Agency remains stoic about the eventual fate of the defunct six tons of orbiting junk whose climate monitoring computers were at one time suspected of being infiltrated by viruses.

Rogue hackers like Gary McKinnon - who allegedly busted into Pentagon computers on a whimsical trawl for aliens - could still be in the frame of course.

The imminent Earth impact has already seen the cancellation of traditional Equinoctial outdoor ceremonies by assorted Druids**, paganised vegans and followers of Zoroaster.

**Apart from the Primrose Hill Chapter.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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