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Funny satire stories about Satellites

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Funny story: O2 Network Collapse Causes Chaos

O2 Network Collapse Causes Chaos

Millions of customers were unable to access their mobile data today when the O2 network suddenly stopped working due to "technical problems". The company did not specify what the problems were, but suffice to say that they were technically technic...

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Funny story: GoreSat ready to blast off into space

GoreSat ready to blast off into space

Cape Canaveral - Fifteen years after being mothballed as a national embarrassment a newly refurbished satellite designed by Al Gore is ready to blast off into outer space. A $95 million makeover sees GoreSat1 primed to orbit the planet for data ga...

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Funny story: Scottish Secret Military Satellite Launch Delayed As No-One Had A Light For The Blue Touch Paper

Scottish Secret Military Satellite Launch Delayed As No-One Had A Light For The Blue Touch Paper

A proposed top secret military defence satellite launch from Glasgow Mission Control missed a launch window by minutes today when it was realised that no one had brought a lighter to light the blue touch paper with. Another launch window is avai...

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Funny story: NASA Will No Longer Provide Russia With Mechanical Parts For Her Satellites

NASA Will No Longer Provide Russia With Mechanical Parts For Her Satellites

HOUSTON - Word coming out of The Lyndon B. Johnson Space Center is that NASA will be making good on the threat they made to Russia one month ago. According to Trent Timmelfarb, NASA spokesperson, the government of Russia was told that if it invade...

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Funny story: NASA Tells Russia That If They Invade The Ukraine NASA Will Stop Supplying Them With Satellite Parts

NASA Tells Russia That If They Invade The Ukraine NASA Will Stop Supplying Them With Satellite Parts

HOUSTON - Trent Timmelfarb, NASA spokesman, told the Lyndon B. Johnson Space Center news media that they have sent a warning to President Putin of Russia. Timmelfarb stated that if Putin invades the Ukraine then NASA will immediately terminate pro...

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Funny story: Rogue Satellite Kills a Hamster in Ottumwa

Rogue Satellite Kills a Hamster in Ottumwa

OTTUMWA, IOWA - A rogue satellite, owned by an Australian multi-millionaire, Herschel McBee, crashed to earth early Tuesday evening in an Ottumwa neighborhood. According to local police, the satellite destroyed a home owned by resident, Lucille...

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Funny story: Russian Satellite Spots Ants On The Planet Mercury

Russian Satellite Spots Ants On The Planet Mercury

MOSCOW - The Russian News Agency, Vodkavich has just announced that Russia's premier satellite Siberia 7 has just sent back some astonishing photos taken of the planet Mercury. A spokesperson for Vodkavich said that 17 of the 19 photographs clearl...

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Funny story: One-Ton Satellite Set To Crash On Secret Al Shabab-Kebab Safehouse

One-Ton Satellite Set To Crash On Secret Al Shabab-Kebab Safehouse

London, UK - Pals of Brit fugitive from justice the Gobshite Widow holed up at a secret terror safehouse at 25 Acacia Avenue, Barking, Isle of Dogs are having none of it of course. This evening's televised predictions about the GOCE (Gravity Field...

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Funny story: Ecuador's state-of-the-art satellite is toast

Ecuador's state-of-the-art satellite is toast

Space - Named after the ancient Greek divine winged stallion Pegasus the 1.2kg nano-satellite got itself into a spot of bother following a smash-up with an orbiting cold war Soviet space snooper. Launched on 25 April from the Chinese spaceport of...

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Funny story: North Korea Now Claims Satellite Launch Was a Success

North Korea Now Claims Satellite Launch Was a Success

Pyongyang NK: North Korea's much publicized satellite launch ended quickly in failure by not achieving orbit, greatly embarrassing the country's new leader Kim Jong Un. The three stage Unha-3 rocket and its weather satellite payload crashed into t...

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Funny story: Solar flare disrupts Sky TV

Solar flare disrupts Sky TV

Couch potatoes across the UK were left without their daily dose of Jeremy Kyle and Loose Women as a solar flare bathed the Earth knocking out Sky's Astra satellite. The several million mile long stream of high energetic particles from the sun trav...

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Funny story: Sky recover signal from Gaga

Sky recover signal from Gaga

Lady Gaga left Sky customers furious following her interesting choice of headgear at the 2011 EMA's. She appeared on stage wearing a satellite on her face, which caused interruption for Skyviewers causing them to lose satellite signal from their...

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Funny story: Satellite Debris Kills Bull: Obama Blamed

Satellite Debris Kills Bull: Obama Blamed

Special to INS - The 20-year-old satellite that crashed into Earth last week had a roughly 1-in-3,200 chance of hitting a person, NASA officials claimed. The Upper Atmosphere Research Satellite, or UARS (pronounced: you-arse), apparently missed the p...

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Funny story: Germans and Israelis attack the earth with scrap metal satellites!

Germans and Israelis attack the earth with scrap metal satellites!

Germany and Israel have been secretly plotting WWIII in outer space. They have been launching satellites which were especially designed to conk out, become scrap and then re-enter the earth's atmosphere bombarding the planets surface. As the world...

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Funny story: Rosat satellite falls on Turkey causing 7.3 earthquake - reports

Rosat satellite falls on Turkey causing 7.3 earthquake - reports

Germany's out-of-control Roentgen Satellite (Rosat) - seen re-entering the Earth's atmosphere around 02.00GMT - is suspected of causing the 7.3 tremor which struck Eastern Turkey's city of Van today. Some 20 tonnes of space junk are thought to hav...

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Funny story: German satellite offers much better odds of us not being obliterated, but they don't teach odds in school

German satellite offers much better odds of us not being obliterated, but they don't teach odds in school

BERLIN, Germany--Time to restock your fallout shelters. The German "Röntgensatellit" or ROSAT will most likely slam into Earth's atmosphere in late October or early November. However, whereas the UARS carried a 1 in 3,200 chance of hitting us, the...

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Funny story: NASA Satellite Falls on Scientist Who Predicted Where it Would Fall

NASA Satellite Falls on Scientist Who Predicted Where it Would Fall

Lead NASA space junk scientist Larry Wrong was killed this morning by a one ton piece of debris from NASA's falling research satellite outside of his Orlando, Miami home. The satellite, UARS, which is commonly known as "the satellite that is falling...

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