21st Century Schizoid Man

Funny story written by Ana Sian

Tuesday, 14 June 2022

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Madness is Written in the Stars!

June 14th is Donald Trump’s birthday. He’s a Gemini.

Castor and Pollux make up the Twins, and anyone who has them in their brain may find they have at least two personalities at any given times. Sometimes those personalities conflict. They fight. They say one thing, but then the Gemini does the opposite. In a word: madness.

They may become delusional, hearing voices of themselves telling themselves they’re awesome and receiving no counter-argument. Can a Zodiac sign be responsible for a person’s erratic behavior? Hiring and firing, praising then blaming the same person within a heartbeat? Saying you love the people (the Good Twin), then inspiring them to overthrow the nation (the Bad Twin)? Easily given over to mad rants and accusations and thinking they are little gods pounding the earth with their heavy boots?

The Twins need to be split up. But then, will that cause even stranger behavior problems? And is there a doctor in the house for Zodiac personality issues? A magician, a wizard, an alchemist trying to turn lead into gold.

All Geminis are fool’s gold. They look valuable on the outside, but inside, they are a seething cauldron of insanity. Happy Birthday, Schizoid Man.

PS: For this day, I did not see “Happy Birthday Donald Trump” trending on Twitter, but I did see a trend of “Happy Birthday, Che Guevara.” With every Evil Twin, there is a Good Twin.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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