Sis-Boom-Bah! The Sounds Heard When Biden Sniffs Kamala’s Hair For First Time

Funny story written by Dr. Billingsgate

Friday, 21 August 2020

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It is noteworthy that this is the same sound heard when a sheep explodes. But what does an exploding sheep have to do with Sniffin’ Joe Biden and Kamala “Breath” Harris?

I’m glad you asked.

Although the exploding sheep joke was one of Johnny Carson’s funniest episodes where he played the role of Carnac the Magnificent on The Tonight Show, sniffing hair in Washington has lately become the new “in thing” among men of power and women who have hair.

It is noteworthy that Dr. Billingsgate is deviating from his successful formula that has pitted Donald Trump against the encroaching onslaught of vagabond Commie-Pinkos: Yes, the same men and women who have infiltrated the Democrat Party, the FBI and American intelligence agencies since Trump was elected President; a format which has brought Dr. Billingsgate fame and fortune.

Having sex with sheep has been a part of American culture since the invent of the Montana Pole. An existential component of the American experience since the early part of 18th century, the ultimate bonding between a shepherd and his wooly friends was first chronicled by Jacque Richard. Jacque, a 40 year-old itinerant Frenchman who came to America to seek a new life, wrote about his loneliness as a professional sheepherder in his diary. It was he who recorded his invention of the Montana Pole. Even though the State of Montana didn’t exist at that time, the pole did.

Until word got out, most shepherds were scornful of its utility. With pleas from the local professional working girls who wanted to have it outlawed for fear of losing business, it was a tough sale. It wasn’t until 1889, when Montana became a state, that it was declared an essential piece of equipment for lonely shepherds. Joseph Kemp Toole, Montana’s first Governor, prayed that women would have the grace to forgive these men for having sex with a sheep. The pole, with a mirror attached to one end, was dangled before the sheep’s head to see if it were smiling. It became a legal instrument to record whether the sheep was a willing partner to the shepherd’s desire.

I digress: A discerning reader might ask: “What does this have to do with Joe Biden and Kamala Harris?”

Slim: “Sis-Boom-Bah.”

“The envelope, please.”

Dirty: “Yo, Dude. Only a mystic could divine the question to that answer: What does it sound like when Joe sticks his nose in Kamala’s hair and she whomps him upside the head, and he responds?”

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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