Da Nang Dick Blumenthal: Liar Or War Hero?

Funny story written by Dr. Billingsgate

Tuesday, 29 January 2019

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Big Watch

BILLINGSGATE POST: What made Da Nang Dick Blumenthal, the U.S. Senator from New York, claim to be a Vietnam veteran? It was a lie, pure and simple; a prima facie example of stolen valor. It was found that he never set foot in Vietnam. And that is why President Trump facetiously labeled him “Da Nang Dick.”

Today Trump addressed this in a Twitter: “How does Da Nang Dick (Blumenthal) serve on the Senate Judiciary Committee when he defrauded the American people about his so-called War Hero status in Vietnam, only to later admit, with tears pouring down his face, that he was never in Vietnam? An embarrassment to our country.”

This brings to light another Spoof story written by this author a few years ago. It also had a Vietnam flavor. However, it was about another Dick: “Obama: Big Watch, Little Dick....Bum F..k!"

To bring you up to date: During the Vietnam war, the US Navy had a base in Subic Bay, Philippines. Ships on their way to and from the Tonkin Gulf would stop there for repairs and provisions. Sailors would take liberty and go into Alongapo City to drink beer and raise Hell. The main street was unpaved, and lined with bars for as far as you could see. In front of each bar was a mean-looking guy with a hog-leg strapped to his thigh.

For entertainment, most bars had small bands with singers who sang current American favorites. The lyrics were in English; however, most of the songs were memorized without any understanding of the words. In the midst of all this were the B-girls who tried to ply drinks from you, and, if they liked you, perhaps suggest a rendezvous later.

It seemed that each bar attracted a different clientele. For instance, pilots off the carriers frequented certain bars; other units, such as the SEALS, also had their own places. The SEALS, naturally, were considered the big dogs in town, because they were usually crazier than any other group. The girls who serviced them understood this, and teased these guys because they wore big watches for their underwater work. They would point at the guy's wrist and yell, "Big Watch, Little Dick!...Bum F..k!"

Obviously, this was in reference to the ostentatious watch that President Obama wore. But what connects Blumenthal and Obama in this story is that both of the Dicks are consummate liars.

Over and out.....

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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