Michael Jackson Died During Gay Demon Exorcism

Funny story written by Wire Piddle

Friday, 26 June 2009

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Exorcism Smoothie

Los Angeles, CA - Entertainer, Michael Jackson, 'The King Of Pop', died yesterday after the result of going into cardiac arrest at his home in the hills above Los Angeles.

It has come to light that he may have been involved in a 'homosexual demon exorcism' at the time. Witnesses state that earlier on in the morning, a white cube ban with the words 'Manifested Glory People's Church Y'all' emblazoned on it, had pulled into the Jackson compound and roughly ten individuals were seen departing the van and entering the back garden.

Here the members were seen with Mr. Jackson, consuming a brunch that had been laid out on long tables covered with white tableclothes and linens. Other adornments included various sliced fruits, pineapples, papayas and honey dew melons, along with an assortment of fruit nectars, juices and bottled waters presented in fluted glasses. However the main dish of the meal seemed to be cucumber sandwiches with their crusts removed; an oddity considering that there were no rich white folk present.

Jackson's manager, Rudy Goodfella, stated that, "...it's quite ordinary for an artist, prior to touring, to seek out as many individuals as they can for input and consultation. There is nothing out of the ordinary here, despite the presence of cucumber sandwiches."

After the meal, the entire group retired into the house where, soon after, gospel music could be heard emanating forth. Finally, a male voice could be heard screaming.

''Loose your hold, in the name of Jesus, you homosexual sprit-tah! We call you out right now. You have no power! ... Come on homosexual demon! We want a clean spirit! Get out of the way!''

Then, a commotion or disturbance could be heard, much like the sound of furniture being overturned and glass objects being smashed against the walls. As abruptly as these noises had started, however, they finished. An eerie silence enveloped the compound.

About eight minutes later, the distance sound of an ambulance could be heard getting closer and closer to the residence. Finally the ambulance arrived and the attendants ventured inside the residence where they subsequently retrieved the lifeless body of Mr. Jackson. He was taken to a hospital where he was therafter pronounced deceased.

One unnamed source has stated that they actually heard Mr. Jackson say, in a muted tone, "...take me to the children's ward."

It remains unclear if the arrival of these individuals had anything to do with the death of Mr. Jackson, he may have been upstairs watching 'The Wiz' on DVD, or for that matter, he may have been in his bathroom suite taking a wiz, events surrounding this matter seem extremely suspicious.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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