Keith Richards Is A Vampire

Funny story written by Fish

Wednesday, 9 July 2008

image for Keith Richards Is A Vampire
Let It Bleed

New Yawk NY-- Keith Richards, famed guitarist for The Rolling Stones, said today he died in 1969 and is a vampire. The rock legend says he died from a drug overdose during the notorious Altamont Concert. A vampire fan jumped up on stage and helped him "cross over and become a vampire."

"Does anyone really believe someone like me could live this long?" asked Keith. "I'm one of the biggest druggies of all time. I've lived at least ten lives and plan to live forever. The Stones will still be playing 10,000 years from now." said the star.

Keith says Mick Jagger and Ron Wood are also vampires. He told Paul and Ringo are also vampires but that John Lennon and George Harrison refused the offer and "paid with their lives."

"I just can't believe anybody thinks the Stones are still alive. We all died decades ago. We are vampires now and we are immortal. It's so easy to get fresh blood too. That's why we still perform concerts. It attracts all the young virgins."

Keith said that turning into vampires inspired some of the Stones best albums. "Just listen to Let It Bleed. It has all the answers." he said.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more